Planning your own funeral and letting your family know
Planning your own funeral in advance is a considerate, practical thing to do, and it does not need to be treated as a big or difficult undertaking. It generally comes down to two separate things: deciding what you would like, and making sure the people who will actually be arranging things know about it, in your own lifetime, rather than only finding out afterwards.
In Australia, funeral wishes written in a will, or in a separate note or wish list, are generally not legally binding on their own. The legal right to arrange a funeral generally sits with the person who has lawful control over the body after death, most often the executor named in your will. An executor is encouraged to follow your wishes where practical, but is not legally obliged to, in most circumstances. There are some narrower exceptions worth knowing about: in New South Wales and Western Australia, a clearly expressed direction about burial or cremation can be legally binding, and in the Northern Territory, South Australia and Queensland, a specific direction that you wish to be cremated can also be binding. These are specific legal points that vary by state, so if having your wishes legally enforced matters to you, it is worth getting advice from a solicitor in your own state rather than relying on general information like this.
A more reliable way to make sure your wishes are actually followed is a straightforward one: tell people directly, while you can. Wills are often not read or located until after the funeral has already taken place, so a wish written only in a will can arrive too late to be useful. Talking to whoever is likely to be your executor, or to your closest family, about what you would like, and writing it down separately as well, gives your wishes a much better chance of being carried out, regardless of the legal technicalities in your state.
What you choose to write down can be as simple or as detailed as you like. Useful things to cover typically include whether you would prefer burial or cremation, roughly what kind of service you would like, if any, who you would want to be told, and any specific requests around music, readings or a particular celebrant or place of worship. None of this needs to be finalised in one sitting, and it is entirely normal to revisit and change it over time.
If you want to go a step further and lock in specific arrangements, a prepaid funeral plan with a specific funeral provider is one way to do that, since it sets out the arrangements directly with the people who will carry them out, rather than relying on family to interpret written wishes later. Our separate article on prepaid funerals, funeral bonds and funeral insurance explains how that option compares with a funeral bond or funeral insurance, if you are also thinking about how to cover the cost.
Choosing the right executor matters here too. Someone who understands and is comfortable carrying out your wishes, and who is likely to be available and willing to take on the role when the time comes, is generally a more useful choice than simply the most senior or obvious family member. This is general information, not legal advice, and if you want your written wishes to carry legal weight in your specific state, a solicitor can advise on what is actually possible where you live.
Frequently asked questions
Generally no, with some exceptions. In New South Wales and Western Australia, a clear direction about burial or cremation can be binding; in the Northern Territory, South Australia and Queensland, a specific wish to be cremated can be binding. Outside these situations, the executor generally has the final say and is encouraged, but not obliged, to follow your wishes.
Generally, the person with lawful control over the body after death, most often the executor named in your will, makes the final decisions, though they are encouraged to take your expressed wishes into account.
Because wills are often not read or located until after the funeral has already taken place. Telling your executor or close family directly, and keeping a separate written note, gives your wishes a much better chance of being followed at the right time.
A prepaid funeral plan with a specific funeral provider is one way to do this, since it sets out agreed arrangements directly with the provider rather than relying on family to interpret your wishes later.